Tuesday, January 27, 2009

When you will.......

( see I am not a poet...dont blame me after reading.....)

Avidly waiting for the time 
When you will be with me !

Got tired of waggling hourglass now,
Come soon before I get broken down,
Not asking for your long time,
Your Body whiff will be a booze-up for my whole life ,

Absolve from the raspy bogey world,
To control my boomerang heart,
Come swaddle me in your arms so tight,
So that we can only hear each others breathe,




Will wear a silky dusty gown,
To match with ur gifted string of beads and flurry sound,
Come play with my sleek brown hair,
I want to feel your warmy whisper in my ears, 

Hold my shaky hand in yours with divine,
Take me towards the shangrila in foamy shivery night,
If I m in a dream then don't wake me up,
Rather laid a wreath on me and let me intoxicatingly numb,

Avidly waiting for the time 
When you will be with me...... 
With me ....
Only we...

P.S.  I still have some feelings left..i m not that insensitive :P

68 comments:

Unknown said...

if its original piece of work...kudos to ur talent...

even if it is not ORIGINAL piece of work...stl kudos to ur talent of taking soo much pain nd findin it on d internet...lolz..

gud work...hmmm

Shekhu said...

a really nice poem to read...
did you find it in your drawer :P

Shekhu said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Rahul said...

soooooooooo romantic :) keep writing...wud love to visi ur blog often now...just added you

Abhishek Sardar said...

wht's up with u...kahin pyaar to nahi ho gaya :P

nice and romantic

crackpot said...

uhh..
so much romances...
had read your previous post..they were totaly diff..
nice use of words..warmy whisper,
intoxicatingly numb,foamy shangrila...omg..
applause !

vanilla sky said...

Some nice verses there :)

AB said...

hahahahha
hahahaha
what a joke..
hahahaha


u cannot make a poem?
what a joke...



Very nice stuff.. (Although at some points, I had to dive and grab my dictionary, otherwise this is just wonderful..) and who said u r not sensitive?

Resurgence said...

Now a poem... Gal good post here... although I do lack the ability to grasp the meaning hidden in poems... :)... Keep improving.. :)

Shravan RN said...

will read the post later, here is the response for your question, splitting myself into 2, see this :
http://obnoxiousmind.blogspot.com/2008/12/ripped-soul.html

Aki said...

Jesus Christ !! ..did u really write dat? i mean d last time i wanted to write a poem i was in class 7 and all i cud rhyme was "memories r gud memories r bad, dey make u happy dey make u sad"..i m still thinkin wat cn b d third line :P ... good job(*thumbs up)

Keshi said...

ty for visiting my blog!

And ur telling me Im a great writer? Look at ur own Writing WOW! Im spellbound. I loved it!


**If I m in a dream then don't wake me up,
Rather laid a wreath on me and let me intoxicatingly numb,

Beautifully expressed.


I guess I've become comfortably numb too...but like u said, I still hv some 'feelings' in me too. My current post was very much related to that.


Keshi.

Anil Sawan said...

u write quite well :) m happy i visited u :)

Anonymous said...

a strong message sent to some one.. is that someone reading this one?

:)

Akshat said...

Touché!!!

Kudos for the poem!!!

Aren't you a poet lost in tme!!

You should write more of these fantastic poems!!!

Take Care

joie de vivre said...

oho
aap kavi bhi ho
dhnya ho prabhu maha talented chorii hai yeh toh

Amrita~Ams said...

@chetan
thxs :)
well this is original piece :P not on net dear

@shekhu
thxs :)
nah not drawer...

Amrita~Ams said...

@rahul..
thank you for lyking it :D
n thxs for adding me

Amrita~Ams said...

@abhishek

heheh..nahi pyar nahi huya :P..not in devdas category yet ;)
nyways thxs :)

Amrita~Ams said...

@crackpot..
ahaan..that was a U-turn frm my side..
again nice name...heheh

Amrita~Ams said...

@vanilla sky..
thxs :)

@abhivan

i had xpected the same comment frm ur side..lolzzz
o cmon..dictionary...its you who taught me that we take xms not give xms :P ..hehhe..

n abt insensitive ek ho toh batu many ppl said that.. :(
nyways thxs for taking the pain to div n grab in dictn. :)

Amrita~Ams said...

@ Resurgence
ya will improve..
n thxs :)

@shravan

read ur poem a nice one :)

Amrita~Ams said...

@aki
work on it to get the third lyn..heheh

Amrita~Ams said...

@keshi..
pleasure was all mine
u pen down wonderfully..

anyways..
thank you so much
n thxs for the visit :)

Amrita~Ams said...

@sawan

thxs for adding me :)
n thxs for d visit

Amrita~Ams said...

@Chriz

heheeh...prob is that not hving any..
...still waiting avidly.........

nyways
thxs for the vist :)

Amrita~Ams said...

@akshat

your comment made my day..
poet lost in tym ...:)

will try to write more..
thxs :)

TC :)

Amrita~Ams said...

@ joiedevivre

its you to inspire me yar..:)
dhyan toh ho..but tere liye bhi..heheh
anyways thxs :)

Anonymous said...

awwee such cuteness..:)

Anonymous said...

are wah bhiya, apan to kavita bhi likh lete he...

sahi he...

and jab wo aapke saath honge to khane peene kaha jaoge ? 56 ya sarafa ?

Phoenix said...

beautiful!! and u thought id not like it!! never!!!

Rià said...

nice one!its not so easy to write a poem i tell u. :) So u hav done a good job.

Amrita~Ams said...

@ pink orchid:
thxs pal :)
n thxs for dropping by

Amrita~Ams said...

@sam..
hehhe not yet decided..
will try sarafa..wat say? ;)

Amrita~Ams said...

@phoenix

thxs :)
its not lyk tat but ur wonderful writter in nyways.. :)tats y said tat

@Ria
thxs :)
n thxs for d visit

Nikhil Menon said...

aren u a poet??and who'z blaming u for this blockbuster??AWESOME!!

Do u miss someone??or is it a fictitious tale?? :)

Nice blog..

Cheers.. :)

Nikhil

Anonymous said...

oye its like sumone change his/her gender :P :P..romantic n uuuuuu...

this is wat u were doing with ur diary n pen the whole weeks.. crap..
gosh u penned down so well dear..
cheers!
luv u :P :P..(dont take it oderwise still straight)..lovely hat off..

-niti

Trinaa said...

superb!!!! i mean...woooow!

Shravan RN said...

nice joke that you arent a poet :) i laughed my heart our.. awesome lines.. just loved it, and here and there, felt something erotic
"Come swaddle me in your arms so tight,
So that we can only hear each others breathe"
"Come play with my sleek brown hair,
I want to feel your warmy whisper in my ears"

Amrita~Ams said...

@multimenon

this is my first tym to write a poem ...
its purely fictional :D...i m still waiting !

Amrita~Ams said...

@anony

hehheeh..y to written all this it is sumthing personal :P

thxs niti..u took pain to vist my blog.

@trina

thank you so much :)

Amrita~Ams said...

@shravan
not joke yar..i writing it first tym..
nyways thxs for loving it :)

Dewdrop said...

Nice post

Mads said...

:O are u sure this was ur first attempt at poetry?
one slap if u stop writing poems
truly amazing piece of work. i clung on to like, each n every word and read it. i didnt want it to end.

*applauds*!!!

The Solitary Writer said...

hey ur nt a poet..... u a poetess :p

btw its good ...and y shud we blame u after reading this....its such a beautiful poem yaaa......u write so well....hoping to read ur work

Kartz said...

Vivid, emotive and alluringly romantic to say the least.

Not to forget, a picture that portrays a surreal parallelism to what you have written.

Neat...

Peace.

---
Greetings.

Thank you for stopping by; I appreciate your time. Hope to see you around more often! :)

Peace. Have a nice day.

Amrita~Ams said...

@Dewdrop

thxs
n Thnx for d visit :)

@Mads

yup i m sure :D
heheh..thxs for only one slap...:P
will try to feel more in order to write more hehehe!
thxs :)

Amrita~Ams said...

@solitary
heheh..u got the point..i m poetess
:P..
i thought 20 tyms before publishing this post :D...just in case if my poem turn out sumthing else ;-)...tats y written tat blaming sentence for caution hehe..

Amrita~Ams said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Amrita~Ams said...

@kartz

thxs for using so many adjectives :D
i feel humble.
thxs for d visit :)

n it was my pleasure to visit ur blog..looking frwd to hv more frm ur side.. :)
thxs n tc :)

Simple Syed said...

ur being too modest by saying ur not a poet ... :)
"Your Body whiff will be a booze-up for my whole life" ... STRONG words ...
i should Thank you for letting me know to use a dictionary ... :P :P

Jus 1 que ... Whr did u get an inspiration to write this poem?? there must be some kinda motivation to write this!! - waiting for an answer ;)

Arv said...

Hi Ams,

thanx for the visit...

now thats some emotional writing there :)

wish that you find your man soon :)

take care... cheers...

Nidz said...

passionate indeeed :P good keep it up.

Amrita~Ams said...

@Syed..
modest thxs for the word. hehehe
inspiration cam after watching rodies 6.0...n ranvijay in tat :D
greedy bloggy :P

@Arv
pleasure mine :)
even i m hoping to get him soon :P :P.
even though i m happy wit my daily crushes heheh..

nyways thxs for d visit

Amrita~Ams said...

@nidhi

passionate...hmmm..u bet??? :D

thxs for the visit :)

The Solitary Writer said...

lol asmi

u thot 20 times before u post
damm.....this is a good poem yaaa

joie de vivre said...

kisi ne kaha mujhse u inspire mein...beta kya conspiracy hai yeh hai...pataa rai hai.???
hehe
thanks a lot it really makes me happy..
:)

chetan manjarekar said...

iska hindi version kab likh rahi hai????????????????????????????
i wont dare 2 read dis amrita.....
saare jargons tune use kar liye hai kya???
but
acha hai
jo b likha hai
dekhne me to acha he lag raha hai yar
kabi tuje time mile to mujhe b samjha diyo
anyways tc n pls write d hindi version

Amrita~Ams said...

@solitary
heheh..i ll not lie..
its not 20 but was 10..heheh
thxs :)

@joiv..
haan ..haan sahi kaha jisne kaha..even when i write funny post i get inspire by ur comments.. :D
cheers !


@chetan
haan dear ll publish that soon..but u hv to pay for that :P :P..
thxs nyways...n thxs for the visit :)

Me said...

Amazingly beautiful :)

PI said...

very interesting!! really liked it :)

Amrita~Ams said...

@harshita

Thxs dear!


@pseudo

thxs :)

Anonymous said...

sarafa jao to apan ko bhi bol dena...

Anonymous said...

this was simple yet impressivley full of emotions !! :)

Anonymous said...

awesome stuff...loved it...
yeah, u r not a poetess...u r in a different league altogether....
very expressive...

Amrita~Ams said...

@pretty me..
thxs dear..

@exotic

diff league??
hey buddy even u got awesum blog :)

workhard said...

i say poetry is talent, thats a very subtle poem.. Good one...

Haiku Poems

Amrita~Ams said...

thxs :)